Need to be more discerning with the central narrative. In some responses, there were competing narratives which got in the way of the event you wanted to tell me about. Stick to one central narrative and get to it as quickly and as efficiently as possible.

Don’t spend too long on the exposition of your response. You haven’t got time. I need to be there in the thick of the action as soon as possible. In some responses, the first page was spent setting the scene which meant there wasn’t enough time to tell me the things you really wanted to tell me.

Guard against the generic, cliched and stereotypical imagery as this can detract from the authenticity of your voice. If an image is over-familiar, the reader might lose confidence in the control of your narrative. It becomes less interesting for them.

Technical accuracy is important. Leave enough time to check for missing full stops, capital letters, question marks etc. Don’t use a comma where a full stop might work a lot better.

Guard against changes in tense. Autobiographical texts are almost exclusively written in the past tense. In some responses, there were changes in tense within the response and this implies a lack of full control in the writing process.

Some responses were brief. You will be expected to write something that is both controlled and sustained in your WACE examination so please be aware of this.

Some responses were introspective and melancholic without much in the way of excitement and action. While this approach can work, be aware that your reader might demand more of your text than you actually deliver.

If you write about sport, do so with an original voice and don’t make it sound like in-game commentary.

The most effective responses had a clear and distinctly original voice that was sustained throughout the response.

Sometimes setting was under-developed.

Some responses used humour really effectively. Don’t be scared to be inventive either.

Don’t overuse dialogue. When used effectively, it can enhance a narrative. When there’s too much of it (particularly where the dialogue is largely incidental), it can slow the narrative down and your response can get bogged down by it.

Guard against predictable responses where the reader is able to signpost what happens early on in the response.

Guard against writing about events which people know a lot about already, the AFL Grand Final for example. Most people know what happened so if you’re going to do so, you’re going to have to do it in a very quirky, unusual way.

When writing about a place, try not to make it read like a Trip Advisor post or some kind of travelogue.

Language is still powerful. Cherish the potential of words and don’t force the imagery when it’s not required. The most effective responses are those with precision of imagery and an economy of language.

Be more selective in the content. Some of the stuff described in your responses could be considered largely irrelevant and incidental. You have to be judicious in what you include… and what you leave out.

Don’t be repetitive with imagery/language. Don’t be repetitive with imagery/language. Don’t be repetitive with imagery/language.